'I want my own life already': 30-year-old pays half of the family's rent then gets lectured by her freeloading little sister that her $700 contribution is no longer enough since she got a higher-paying job

Advertisement
  • Cheezburger Image 10470693120
  • "My sister “lectured” me and essentially said I owe my parents more money than I’m already giving"

    Ever since I (30F) had been employed at my current job (two years ago), the subject of money has come up several times specifically, my money, because I Iam now the highest earner in the family. Money was never an issue when I worked at my old job,
  • where I was earning half of what I'm getting now. I don't like to show off my income to anyone, either, but I've gotten so many comments now that I'm earning more. The minute I was hired, I started getting questions like, when (not
  • if) I was going to buy a house with them, when we should start looking, etc. At 28 years old, I was already thinking of using my new salary to find a place of my own, but my family tried to have me get a house with them, despite my obvious reluctance to
  • persuasive do it. They were very and I almost did - however, I started getting more depressed and angry, knowing that my chance at living independently was slipping away from me. So after much hemming and hawing, I finally put my foot down and
  • said no, that I was going to get an apartment (and be roommates with a friend of mine since she was also looking for a place) and spread my wings. It's been a struggle looking for a place because my friend has a dog and rent isn't cheap, but I'm determined to do this because I want my own life to start already.
  • Ever since then, twice already, my younger sister (25F) has "lectured" me that I should be contributing more to the household than I already am. In her words, the money I'm already giving isn't enough, even though I pay for a huge portion of the rent
  • and pay for the WiFi (which she uses for her college classes) and contribute to other miscellaneous things without her help. She thinks I owe my mom more because of everything Mom has done for us.
  • Mind you, I am very appreciative and grateful of everything our parents have done for us and thus had increased my contribution to the rent after I had left my old job. Sure, I don't pay the full $1.4K of the rent, but I do pay a huge
  • portion of it — money that I'm sure my sister wouldn't think was "nothing" if she had to pay it. Twice now, she's given me this irritating lecture. Both times, it was because she had gotten an idea of how much I'm making and
  • decided that it was her rightful duty to talk over me and make me feel like sh. (The first time this happened, it was because I had given a Lyft driver a huge tip, and the second time, it was because she took a look at how much I was getting in my tax return and saw my W-2 from 2024.)
  • My sister barely contributes anything to the household because she doesn't earn much and is also going to school so she's on a per diem work schedule. As far as I know, she's only contributing $200 monthly,
  • while I'm contributing at least $700 minimum monthly. Yet I'm the one to be lectured and talked to condescendingly as if I'm not doing enough. I'm beyond angry and exhausted of this. I can't wait to get out.
  • Y
  • Edit: My parents had no idea of my sister's condescending lecture. I spoke with my mom about it and she was irritated, agreeing with me that she had no right to be lecturing me like that. Seems like this is mainly the issue with my sister only, not my parents.
  • MmeGenevieve Tell her that you'll be moving soon, so she's going to need to figure out how to make up for the shortfall. If she persists with the nagging, tell her you've decided to only contribute the same amount she contributes monthly. That should shut her up!
  • RickRussellTX She's lecturing you because she knows that when you leave, your parents will come to her. She wants you firmly installed as the sole provider so she can get out. Just get your crop together and go, OP. Stop explaining, justifying, defending yourself.
  • SavingsSensitive3796 Tell her "I KNOW YOU can afford more than $200. You should be paying at least $500 monthly. Why aren't you?" Put the focus back on her and keep repeating it.
  • WhichConsideration4 Don't set yourself on fire to keep people warm. You are not required to make sure everything is covered for them. Go live your life and be happy!
  • Humble Scarcity1195 As soon as you get out the money tap needs to be turned off completely. Dont let them guilt you in to paying for anything or they will blad you dry. Enjoy your life away from your controlling family.
  • merrywidow14 So as one person you're paying half the rent plus and sister thinks you should pay more. Tell her to pound sand and when she's working she can pick up the slack because your parents "deserve" it. Do your parents know what she's saying and if they do, what are their reactions? Save your money and get out, but don't be surprised when sis comes crying to you about her/their finances.
  • Sugar_Mama76 Dear Fam, It has come to my attention that you are unhappy with the contributions I am making to your household. Since I am not able to live up to your expectations, I will rescind all contributions. You no longer have to be angry and try to guess my pay anymore.
  • I have made the decision to live on my own, and I promise I will not as for any assistance from any you. I can't ask anyone to fund my own decisions and lifestyle. I'll extend the same courtesy to everyone else. Regards, OP

Tags

Scroll Down For The Next Article